I have been awake for roughly one hour and I’m already so tired that my eyes feel heavy and yawns are interrupting my ability to comprehend life. I feel like I got no sleep at all. What the hell happened to me last night?!?! I may need to rethink my stance on the sleep apnea…
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Disclaimer: No Lolas were hurt in the making of this post. Sometimes Lola wakes up feeling like a piggy. Sometimes she feels like a cow. Other times she wakes up feeling like a groundhog and tries to burrow back into the covers on the bed. Today she woke up just a tad bit…heavier. I realized…
Read MoreThank you sweet baby Jesus sitting in a manger, the Olympics are finally done. I mean, without gymnastics, there’s really no point. And all my shows were on repeat which really sends my evening life into disarray. Not to mention, it was held in Russia. Dear mother Russia, the place where gay people must run for…
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So a while back, Lola created a stockpile of cake grenades. We left off with her sitting on them like North Korea sits on their nukes and tries to play who will blink first games with the US. You can read about it here. Last night Lola lobbed her first cake grenade. She was upset that…
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Last night Lola participated in the highly anticipated “Women’s Sleep Relay“ event. And she took home the gold medal. I went to bed late, Lola was already asleep with the Daddybeast so I tried to get in the bed quietly. I realized pretty quickly that it was too quiet. Lola had buried her face in the multitude…
Read MoreThis week’s most popular search to find my blog was a good one: What should I buy at Costco? Now, I’m assuming this person was attempting to find out what items you should buy in bulk and what items you are better of buying in smaller quantities. Unfortunately, this poor bastard wound up on my…
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Disclaimer: If you have recently lost a loved one please for the love of god, do NOT read any further. Unless you were the guy making jokes during the wake. Then you can continue reading because I am the one who makes jokes during the wake. Hey, we all deal differently. You know how everyone…
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So I’ve been struggling with writer’s block for days, days I tell you. Now, you might not think a blogger can suffer from writer’s block because I am blogging true events. But indeed, it’s writer’s block. I mean, if I just told you that I went to Costco, how would that be funny? Or if…
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Lola has prepared a stockpile of cake grenades and she’s threatening to lob them all over the world. What happened, you ask? Well, she’s on medicine and needed a bath – she feels she was unduly tortured by the two events. Normally she doesn’t protest her bath, she’ll let us put her in the tub…
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Do you ever have one of those days where all you want to do is sit down and indulge in a marathon session of TV on the Bravo channel? If not, move along, you may be in the wrong place. Today was definitely one of those days for me. I woke up and the first thought…
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Shank You Very Much 