Yesterday I wrote a blog about buying boxed foods from the UK that were made by American companies but had far fewer unpronounceable words in the ingredient list than their American counterpart. I was going to order from Amazon UK and I was swimming along fairly well. And then I hit a roadblock. You can’t…
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It looks like Amazon…
Today I decided to jazz up my online browsing because I almost died of sheer boredom. I was on Amazon and I was plain sick of seeing the same old stuff I order all the time. And then I keyed in a couple of letters and my day was magically transformed. I went to the…
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Lola is so subtle…
Today I was enjoying a little reading time while catching up on crappy daytime TV (someone please kill me now). I’m not ashamed to say I was ignoring my very rambunctious Lola as she ran around the house like she was hooked up to an IV of cocaine. I heard her barking a few times…
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That’s a win no matter how you view it….
Here comes another year. As you all know by now, I don’t believe in resolutions because people always fail and end up despising themselves for their failure. I like to start my new year off with a win instead. This year, I’ve decided my goal would be to wake up earlier than 11am every day.…
Read MoreThose wild eyes make sense…
I’ve been on vacation now for just over a week. It’s not really a vacation since I’m sitting at home but, I’m not working so that’s amazing. Here’s the only problem I have. Well, I have a couple, but we’ll talk about one of them today. Why is daytime TV so boring?! It is the…
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I don’t need that in my life…
Lola is such a drama queen. Last night I started packing up Christmas, not because I necessarily wanted to, but because I knew if it stayed out much longer I would be trying to dust tiny baby Jesus and would most likely break the little guy. And since he tried to murder Lola earlier this…
Read MoreThe Apple Genius oxymoron…
126. That was the number that redefined my life. One-hundred motherfucking twenty-six. The moment I managed to hack into encrypted data in my Apple accounts. Data I was told was unrecoverable by Apple after a two-hour support call. I find this story is best told in George Costanza’s voice, so channel him as you read…
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Tis the season…
For really early group text messages. And I mean early. My clock still showed 5 as the first number. And I didn’t recognize anyone who was sending me the messages. I tried muting the conversation but it failed and I kept getting alerts. After the fifth person chimed in with the exact same response I may…
Read MoreIt was either jail or new chairs…
You know what they should call appointments for your car? The ‘sit and wait for hours so we can leave your car in the parking lot while we work on the other 100 cars we gave that appointment to’ club. Even though there are only 6 mechanics on duty. Someone should be shanked. As soon as…
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You’ve missed me…
I am currently on vacation from my home daycare. I packed the Tiny Little up and sent her across the country, just to make sure her teething didn’t keep me awake at night. I sent the Big Little to another provider with a detailed listing of his likes and dislikes. Pooping and eating pretty much…
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Shank You Very Much 