Lola and I were playing a game of catch today with her favorite pink rubber ball. As I threw it, Lola was jumping about 5 feet into the air and catching the ball. It’s an impressive feat to watch, considering her very meager size of 18 inches tall. I guess when they were assigning all…
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The Hubster. The man I married. The man I handpicked out of hundreds to tie my life to. Why does he vex me so?! It all began on a quiet day. I had a raging migraine and wanted a bag of my chips. I love those teeny tiny variety bags you get in the very…
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Bedtime is perhaps my favorite time of day. Our bed has a very specific order to it. Hubster sleeps on the left side, Lola in the middle (lying on her side with feet pointing at Hubster) and I’m on the right. Everyone is usually happy. Until broken ribs and rolled ankles get thrown into the…
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And decided to spice it up a bit. Lame pun intended. And to both of my brothers who went to culinary school, shut your laughing mouths and give me a damn hand! So, in reality I am making a book of all the recipes I have used and butchered to make them suit me. Because…
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Or should I say #MakeMeWantToViolentlyShankSomeone?! If you are a hashtag aficionado, this post may not be the one for you. Or better yet, read it and maybe you’ll see how us non-hashtaggers view you. I cannot believe I just typed the word non-hashtagger. Even more shocking was the fact that my spell check thinks this…
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For totally obscure, bizarre rational reasons. Today she calls me and tells me how much she loves and misses me. Inside I start praying to baby Jesus to save me. Here’s the thing. My mom rarely calls me on a weekday. Or for no reason other than to say she loves me. There’s usually at…
Read MoreI am not a big fan of spiders. Who is?! Despite my dislike, I do appreciate that they keep the insect population down. However, I have just one question; who keeps the spider population down? We have an unattached garage that we rarely use. When I say rarely, I mean the door hasn’t been opened…
Read MoreSo today I am happily scrolling through Facebook and I am dreaming of my breakfast. I’m hoping a quesadilla will make an appearance when I get so scared I have to go crap my pants. There was a cat picture, but it wasn’t your normal cat picture. This was the Chuck Norris of cats (I wish I…
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Disclaimer: I mock the Navy in this blog. It’s my birthright because I’ve been in the Navy since I was -9 months old. That’s when my dad and mom did something I never want to think about. And now I’m thinking about it. I am going to shank my brain and swirl now… Today the…
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So as you all know, yesterday was the day of the big elections. I was reelected as The President and the Daddybeast has been ordered to remain in his post, apparently he wasn’t up for reelection and there is no stepping down. Well, after a rough night and early morning Lola is demanding a recount of the…
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Shank You Very Much 