So everyone knows by now that the house we’re living in has tried to kill me multiple times in the past 3 years. Usually by electrocution (how I earned the nickname Sparky), once by stairwell (because, of course), and once by shower (I never blogged about it because it was too traumatizing). Well, the house…
Read MoreThere’s a new pattern in my life and I hate it. Yesterday morning started off early – I was awake at 0419. Yes, to the minute I know when I looked at the clock because I was flabbergasted by my body betraying me into consciousness. I guess it wasn’t really my body, so much as…
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Yesterday was the first day of what the Hubster is deeming “The Lola & Heather Adventures.” No work schedule, no Littles shrieking in delight/anger/frustration or pure unadulterated rage – no reason at all to even get out of our pajamas. Except no one else got the memo. By 0730 I had so many phone calls…
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So, this is the longest stretch I’ve ever gone without posting since I started my blog 3 years ago – a whole week and a half. And in that short time, or really long time for those of you with addiction issues, I’ve managed to need an emergency room visit in the middle of the…
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I now have a complete understanding of the faces I see walking out of Home Depot on the weekends. You know the faces. People have a cart full of items you can’t identify and their faces have that look like, “you fucking talk to me and I’m going to lose it” as they push that…
Read MoreThis weekend I decided to break my previous shopping record for most money spent in under two hours. To date, the best I’ve ever done was a few thousand dollars during a particularly weak moment in an Apple store. And half of that could be blamed on the Hubster. We decided iPods, iPads, iMacs and…
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I recently wrote about a squirrel who has decided to renegotiate his contract with the local humans. This squirrel has decided to declare war on Lola and I in our own backyard. Read about it here. Following the events of the last post, things have gotten a lot worse with the squirrel. He’s gathering reinforcements…
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Lola is a well-trained, intellectually gifted animal. I am her Mommybeast so I may be biased, but I bet you’ll agree with me by the end of this post. I came to that conclusion last night while ordering Dominos pizza for Hubster and me. I like to order the pizza on the computer, not the…
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Last night there was an intense standoff. It all started when I made Lola go out, into the pitch dark void that is our backyard at night. She doesn’t like to go out at night, but I also don’t like poop and pee in my bed, so I force her into it. So there I…
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Over the weekend we had a terrible storm hit here in WA state. Normally I’d be upset that the severe wind and rain caused me to lose power all day on Saturday, but considering the amount of wildfires we have raging right now, I’d say the rain was a good thing. I used my day…
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Shank You Very Much 