I’m sure you’ve all heard the theory that what can go wrong, will go wrong. Remodeling my new house has proven that theory correct, every single time I turn around. The kitchen would not fit right, the flooring was a pain in the ass, and the water flowing all over the floors was a sure…
Read MoreI don’t think I’m cut out to herd cats…
I spent this weekend with Hubster at the new house… cattleprodding my contractor to work. I swear to you, it’s like herding cats to get this guy to focus on the task and not wander off. He would look up from a tool and suddenly realize that there was a sky outside he needed to…
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He’s going to need a raise…
So everyone knows by now that the house we’re living in has tried to kill me multiple times in the past 3 years. Usually by electrocution (how I earned the nickname Sparky), once by stairwell (because, of course), and once by shower (I never blogged about it because it was too traumatizing). Well, the house…
Read MoreMy life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be…
There’s a new pattern in my life and I hate it. Yesterday morning started off early – I was awake at 0419. Yes, to the minute I know when I looked at the clock because I was flabbergasted by my body betraying me into consciousness. I guess it wasn’t really my body, so much as…
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Adventure Team assemble…
Yesterday was the first day of what the Hubster is deeming “The Lola & Heather Adventures.” No work schedule, no Littles shrieking in delight/anger/frustration or pure unadulterated rage – no reason at all to even get out of our pajamas. Except no one else got the memo. By 0730 I had so many phone calls…
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I’m baaaaaaack baby!
So, this is the longest stretch I’ve ever gone without posting since I started my blog 3 years ago – a whole week and a half. And in that short time, or really long time for those of you with addiction issues, I’ve managed to need an emergency room visit in the middle of the…
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Please don’t make me kill you in the parking lot…
I now have a complete understanding of the faces I see walking out of Home Depot on the weekends. You know the faces. People have a cart full of items you can’t identify and their faces have that look like, “you fucking talk to me and I’m going to lose it” as they push that…
Read MoreThat’s a terrible law, let me live in denial…
This weekend I decided to break my previous shopping record for most money spent in under two hours. To date, the best I’ve ever done was a few thousand dollars during a particularly weak moment in an Apple store. And half of that could be blamed on the Hubster. We decided iPods, iPads, iMacs and…
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Look at him staring at me…
I recently wrote about a squirrel who has decided to renegotiate his contract with the local humans. This squirrel has decided to declare war on Lola and I in our own backyard. Read about it here. Following the events of the last post, things have gotten a lot worse with the squirrel. He’s gathering reinforcements…
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Sometimes intelligence skips a generation…
Lola is a well-trained, intellectually gifted animal. I am her Mommybeast so I may be biased, but I bet you’ll agree with me by the end of this post. I came to that conclusion last night while ordering Dominos pizza for Hubster and me. I like to order the pizza on the computer, not the…
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Shank You Very Much 