So I was very torn over writing this blog, but decided I had to do it or my head would spontaneously combust. I know some of you will disagree, such is life. Just please get to the end before your head explodes on your keyboard, mkay? I do not get the whole outrage over people…
Read More
Scared, cold, and alone – a tale of survival…
There is danger lurking everywhere… especially the long hallways!
Read More
The morning routine that will never be…
Anyone who truly knows me, knows one important fact about me. I absolutely loathe having to wake up any earlier than the exact amount of time it takes me to get ready – and getting ready should not take more than 20 minutes. I love, love, love my short haircut, but it can be a…
Read MoreSpell by rhyme…
I was happily minding my own business today when BAM! Out of nowhere came the realization that illiteracy is running rampant throughout the country. Social media has completely ruined us, and not in a good way. I was fine with people creating fun spellings in a hashtag format – sometimes the real word is just…
Read More
Earth was a huge mistake…
Today I decided to look up the word Earth on Wikipedia. It was a huge mistake. My head hurts, my eyes are watering, and I think I may have drooled out the words HELP ME as my hand fell off the mouse. You see, while I love Wikipedia, I just have one problem. I can never…
Read More
It’s brindle baby…
Have you ever been sitting in front of your computer when you suddenly ask yourself “Did I just fucking shart myself?” and then you have to run to the bathroom to check? No? ………………………. Me neither. In other news, Lola has determined her racing name will be Vroom Vroom Brindle. Give her a break, she’s…
Read More
Lola’s Thoughts
So Lola was dancing around this morning in the kitchen. And of course she chose to do so when I was cooking for the playdate my daycare was having over for breakfast. Needless to say, trying to cook for 6 kids and two adults with a dog underfoot can make you nuts. Lola was getting…
Read MoreIt’s a fucking monopoly…
Dear sweet mother of God. Someone’s going to PAY for this atrocity! This morning I woke up to the whining of the Hubster. It wasn’t really whining, but since I am seven hours removed from the moment and my life has gotten more difficult since then, I have decided he must have been whining. About…
Read More
They can’t see me…
Recently a loyal reader asked Lola how she interacts with big dogs. Apparently, this reader has a little dog that just pees and then whimpers in fear whenever a large dog is present. Lola had the answer for this tiny puddle maker. “I like to lie down immediately upon noticing a big dog in the…
Read More
A tale of tragedy: Lola and the pink rubber ball…
Lola and I were playing a game of catch today with her favorite pink rubber ball. As I threw it, Lola was jumping about 5 feet into the air and catching the ball. It’s an impressive feat to watch, considering her very meager size of 18 inches tall. I guess when they were assigning all…
Read More
Shank You Very Much 