I’m a night owl. Sure, I love a good sleep just like anyone else, but I prefer that sleeping to be done during the day. I’m not sure why I like the night so much, but I think it has a lot to do with television shows without interruptions, Taco Bell lines that are short,…
Read MoreThe ducks want their lips back…
Society is under attack by a new and invasive adversary that will stop at nothing to watch us fall…ducklips. Regretfully, I don’t know if they are actually called that or even if I spelled it correctly. It could be duck lips, duck head, duck face… you get the picture. I’m sure you’ve seen a pose or…
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Flowing rivers of cheese and the fall of a fat kid…
Well it’s over, it’s all over! After an 82 day streak my Taco Bell addiction was too much. Hubster went to bed at 11pm and I started plotting my escape to get nacho cheese. I tried to be strong. I even appealed to social media for help but everyone was sleeping. By 1am the strength…
Read MorePresidents, protesters, and the chaos of peace…
I had to take this morning off to watch the inauguration and stare with dumbfounded shock at the “peaceful” protests that were being held in Washington D.C. Here we go, my first (and hopefully only) political post ever. Why do people who are protesting, inevitably end up smashing the property around them? The protestors on…
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Coffee, unicorn tears, and a cold wasteland…
I started writing this post and thought it would be one or two paragraphs at most. I should have known better. Last night I discovered what a weirdo I was. I mean, I always knew I was weird, but last night really drove home how weird I was. I met a new blogger friend who is…
Read MoreI’m a little bit scared for you all…
I’ve been challenged to blog every day for an entire month. Normally I post 5 or so blogs a week, sometimes less and sometimes more. It just depends on how much of my crazy I’m willing to let the public see. Well, now there’s no avoiding it. I’m going to post every day for the…
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It’s just a little tight on me…
I decided to check into my blog after the third Twitter message came through asking if I had finally eaten the Twinkie that took my life. No, no Twinkies have killed me! I’ve been spending some time with Hubster who is lounging at home for a few weeks. I’ve also been preparing myself for a visit…
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Why you shouldn’t compromise in your marriage…
Everyone has the key to a successful marriage. Whether or not that key actually works for a marriage is another story. My favorite “key to marriage” trope is compromise. Everyone touts compromise like it’s the second coming of Christ and your marriage will be peaceful and harmonious if you participate in it. That’s not exactly…
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Many pizza rolls were harmed in the making of this blog…
Well I’ve done it! I’ve beaten (or eaten) my way through a two-week slump where there were virtually NO funny ideas coming out of my head. I just woke up each morning at a reasonable hour, thought mundane things that made no one laugh, and then went to bed promptly at 10 each night. Hubster…
Read MoreI wish I had a cooler story…
I broke my foot. Once again, I have broken my foot and I have no idea how or when I did it. For about three weeks my foot has been in pain, most days I just limp around the house in denial that I need to see a doctor. Today was the end of that…
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Shank You Very Much 