, , , , , , , , ,

Society is under attack by a new and invasive adversary that will stop at nothing to watch us fall…ducklips. Regretfully, I don’t know if they are actually called that or even if I spelled it correctly. It could be duck lips, duck head, duck face… you get the picture. I’m sure you’ve seen a pose or two on social media.

A girl puckers up her mouth in a “sexy” way and then tilts her head down while extending her arm to comical heights in order to photograph herself at a downward angle. The resulting look is intended to…

I’m not even sure.

Or better yet, the girl standing in front of the bathroom mirror, body turned to the side, while she looks straight into the camera with her duckhead and a phone dangling above her head. That pose is definitely a favorite of mine – humans mimicking animals when not accompanied by children under the age of five.

This girl in the photo is always under the age of 30. Never have I seen someone older than 30 pull off the duck face successfully. They think they are successful, and for that we are required by law to applaud – we wouldn’t want to ruffle their feathers.

You and I both know though, she failed miserably.

So why is it that people younger than 30 seem to be able to contort their facial muscles into a shape that had been previously reserved for fowl? Are duck heads foolish enough to think their loved ones don’t know what their faces look like? It’s not as if society will ever really believe that your cheeks naturally rest between your teeth.

If the look is intended as a method to attract men, what happens when you finally have an overnight with a guy you really like? He rolls over in the morning and….”OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO HER BONY CHEEKS AND HER PURSED, FLAT MOUTH?! I can’t possibly date this normal looking human when I thought I was dating an aquatic beauty.”

Talk about a weird relationship killer.

I’ve noticed a side effect from all this duck facing that is being performed. Women who make frequent ducklips have developed a tendency to rest their mouth like that even when not taking a photo. You know how your mother told you not to make weird faces or it would get stuck that way?!

Your mother was right.

A duck graphic with the phrase 'the ducks want their lips back!'

Check out my Facebook page @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet

You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much