So my blog has been on fire lately and I’ve been having a heck of a laugh seeing what search terms are leading people into my blog. I’ve picked the most recent and tried to determine which blog post they actually ended up reading based on their searches. There were a few really fun ones that I couldn’t determine, those people must be officially nuts.
But they’re my nuts, I’m keeping them!
-mow my lawn stupid ass (Wow! I will not mow your lawn.)
-how to kill Sasquatch (Well, step one, find him.)
-dressed up puppies (Well, that could describe a large number of my blogs. And my life philosophy in general, though Lola hates me when I put her in clothes.)
-old school caboodles (See?!? I knew I wasn’t the only one who missed those wonderful pieces of 1980s history!)
-tongue splits because of sour skittles (Oh boy. Another victim. Don’t feel bad, they get us all….and we go back for more.)
-are you with me are against me (That’s right, you set that ultimatum down and if they aren’t with you, you shank them.)
-for me or against me (I seriously love all the vendettas people are wandering around with. It aids digestion and burns calories.)
-truck road sign (Ah, someone who is as confused as I am.)
-i’m your sour patch kid (Well, how’d the candy get on the internet? Did he grow some thumbs and escape his candy box and decide to tool around on my blog?!? If you were my sour patch kid, you’d be in my belly already. I’m not sure where you were going, but hopefully you found your way into someone’s belly.)
-this aint a prison shank (Oh boy. It’s a breakout. Someone get the pepper spray!)
I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet
Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much