Dear Lola,

Your Mommybeast recently went on a wild social media tour, asking us to decide whether pineapple was an acceptable topping for a pizza. As the numbers started rolling in, she became, let’s use the word upset because unhinged sounds a bit harsh, and tried to turn the poll in her favor. Threats were made, seemingly in humor, and she even tried bribery as a last effort. The poll obviously didn’t end the way your Mommybeast thought it would, her readers absolutely love pineapple on pizza! There was talk of revenge and remembering this betrayal forever. Please settle this for us, I think the message will mean the most coming from you. Does pineapple belong on a pizza?

Sincerely,
Pineapple Pete

Advice for humans. They need all the help they can get.

Dear Pineapple Pete,

I hope you appreciate what a delicate situation you have put me in. I am a devoted canine, loyal to Mommybeast even when she is acting a bit like a toddler whose favorite toy has been taken. I could never betray her, for she has not once betrayed me.

Unless you count all those vet visits.

I’ve forgiven her for those veterinarian visits though, because she is my Mommybeast. I love her enough to overlook her absolute hypocrisy in demanding I stay healthy through continued healthcare while she brazenly avoids going to the doctor until one of her internal organ ruptures. Even if I set love aside, I need the Mommybeast.

I have no thumbs to open my food bucket!

Who will ensure I am fed if I turn on the Mommybeast? Who will share their cheese with me? Daddybeast hates cheese, he won’t buy it for me! Who will give me a bath every week, and ensure I have a dinosaur swimming pool full of fresh water in the summer? Who will blow bubbles at my face while I leap with excitement? Who will gleefully rub my belly while I lie back and enjoy it?

Mommybeast is the best.

Okay, I think I’ve blathered on long enough that she’s no longer paying attention to what I’m saying – she’s just a mindless typing machine. Mommybeast is wrong. Dead wrong. Pineapple is delicious, even though I’ve never tasted it in my lifetime. I have smelled it and drooled for hours afterwards.

Something that good must taste divine on pizza!

Uh oh. Mommybeast just looked at me with side-eye. Guess she was paying attention. So, now that I’m in a bit of trouble with her, I’ll need you to show up for my feedings and scoop food into the bowl.

♥Lola♥

Send Lola your questions in the comments, or by clicking one of my social media links below!


Check out my Facebook page @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet

You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much 

60 replies on “Dear Lola – Pineapple Pete…

  1. Oh no sorry Lola but we are going to fall out on this one because in my opinion pineapple should never be placed on a pizza – EVER!! That is just a culinary crime. And I know that a lot of people love it but still I have to say no, no, no! In fact I would go so far as to say that the only things needed on a pizza base are tomato sauce, cheese and basil and that’s it. Give me a plain Margherita anyday! #dreamteam

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree whole heartedly about the pineapple and I also prefer a plain cheese pizza so that I can just enjoy the simple flavors. I think Lola just went a bit crazy when she wrote this letter!

      Like

  2. Oh Lola, the betrayal! I don’t hate pineapple on pizza per se, although I’d never choose it. I’m not sure how I feel about any cooked fruit in savoury dishes, really…. But that’s another debate.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The pineapple discussion is cause for big arguments in this house. My husband is Italian so a def NO. The kids on the other hand…are kids so yes. For me, no because it’s disgusting, but authenticity doesn’t come into it.#GlobalBlogging

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Lola’s right, pineapple on pizza is delicious. It sometimes makes ME drool and I’m homosapien not canine! Also did you know homosapien means wise man(woman), so I must be right. It sounds like Pineapple Pete needs to sort out his attitude – maybe drag him to the vet next time you have to go! 😜 I can see #globalblogging is going to bring lots of humour to my day. Thanks for hosting

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I am with you Heather. I love pineapples but not on my pizza. I do not understand people’s obsession with pineapple on their pizza. My ex-husband used to order pizza with pineapples and I tried it once. Never again! So I’m in total agreement with you Heather. #GlobalBlogging

    Liked by 1 person

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