Dear Lola – Worker hygiene leads to complaints…

Dear Lola,

I am the manager at a small family-owned business. The owners are no longer involved in the day-to-day management of the business and I handle any issues that arise with the employees. One of my top workers is fabulous at everything she does in the workplace. She is stellar at sales and handles her client list without issue. However, her personal hygiene is lacking. Since she doesn’t see clients in person, this hasn’t been an issue. However, some of her coworkers have complained to me and asked me to resolve the issue. Frankly, I do not know if there is a way to do this without embarrassing both of us and maybe having her be uncomfortable in the office. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Quite the Quagmire

Dear Quite the Quagmire,

Whoo buddy, you have found yourself in quite the pickle! A stinky, briny, funktastic pickle that will not cease with the closing of a jar. Imagine putting in the effort to attend college, earning an expensive degree, clawing your way through job interviews, landing a wonderful job in upper management… to then spend your time educating adults on how to wash their bodies. I bet you wish you were a mere worker bee right at this moment.

I guess it’s not always good to be the queen.

As I see it, you have two options. Option one is to gift every worker in the office a goody bag. In it you should include soaps, shampoos, deodorants, perfumes, toothpaste, and any other items you think this worker needs to get her smell up to snuff. Be sure to purchase the exact same items for each bag to avoid that dreaded moment where someone feels singled out. Will it cost the company an outlandish amount of money? Perhaps. Will your workers feel weird that their manager is gifting them bathing items? Maybe. Will your workers be likely to know exactly who this ‘gift’ was intended for? Definitely.

A little public shaming never hurt anyone.*

Your second option is to set up a biohazard room at your workplace. Think ‘science lab decontamination suite’ without the threat of death or major outbreak. As each employee strolls through the front door, they immediately hit the showers. Only once they have scrubbed themselves raw are they allowed to enter the pristine halls of your prestigious office wearing their new uniform – onesie pajamas. Will it cost the company an outlandish amount of money to install? Perhaps. Will your workers feel weird that you are seeing them in nightwear? Maybe. Will your workers be likely to know exactly who this procedure was designed for? Definitely.

A little public shaming never hurt anyone.*

I think you need to be forthright with your worker. I assume this hygiene problem is new or she likely would not have made it past the interview stage. You say this worker is one of your top performers, so treat her as such. Pull her aside and ask if she is doing ok. Point out that you have noticed she seems to be less put together than she was previously and you wanted to check in on her.

Do not, at any point, mention that other workers have mentioned this problem to you.

Showing concern and giving your employee a gentle nudge should resolve the issue. If it doesn’t, I strongly encourage you to install a firehose on the outside of the building and spray everyone down as they enter for work.*

*This is a terrible, terrible idea and I highly recommend you only move forward with it if you enjoy being the defendant in a massive lawsuit and are eager to seek new employment.

♥Lola♥

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