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So two years ago I made the final switch to an all Apple diet. Meaning I tossed out the PC and switched to an iMac.

A close up picture of a slice of cake with the caption

You didn’t think I became a health nut or something, did you?!?!

Now my iPhones, iPads, iPods and Apple TVs have a flawless leader to keep them running and organized. I even have an Apple router for seamless performance.

Life was good.

Today I decided to start organizing my iPhoto. I figured, hell, what’s the big deal?! It won’t take long. Then I looked and saw the number of photos in my library. 9,000. How is that even possible? Did I someone manage to hold down the camera button as I slept for 3 weeks? Did aliens use my camera to tour the entire planet? Did someone sneak into my house and add photos while I was establishing my singing career in the shower one morning?!

This madness must be stopped!

I began the mind numbing task of converting PC arranged photos to the iPhoto method of organizing. Now for those of you unaware of what this requires, it is like trying to learn how to convert modern-day English into Ancient Egyptian Hieroglyphics. To speed up the process, I called Apple.

I had the foresight to purchase the “help me I’m a dumbass idiot” plan!

They told me I was on a painstaking journey but that it would get better. The lady told me to start slow and with one untitled event. Which is apparently how your items get imported. Photos are grouped by date and each date is an untitled event that you then organize however you want.

Okay……..got it. So she instructed me to label the faces first. She said it’d get better with time and the software would start to identify people more readily. Okay, I’m listening. Then select a group and assign location, titles, description and change dates if I had too. Got it. Essentially the more data you give it, the easier it is to find photos in the future. Well great, this is not looking too hard. I mean, all I have to do is add a few labels. How bad could it really be?!?!

A text card that says 'my mother raised me right, but if you touch my cake... I will shank you.'
It was that bad.

I spent 5 hours working on it. I only got through 1,000 photos. And I ate 40 pizza rolls while trying not to swirl my brain through my ears with a Qtip made of steel.

I’m on to a new plan now. Wait for robots to take over and just ask them to locate the photos I want to view.

Update May 13, 2018 – this post was originally written in March of 2014. I now have over 13,000 photos. I went through and culled crappy photos – I was actually over 16,000 at one point. The madness hasn’t stopped. Someone get those robots here!


Check out my Facebook page @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet

You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much or click to see a special collection below: