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So today was the day. The day I made the infamous mac & cheese balls I bought from Costco the other day. The day heaven met earth in my mouth and I was going to live happily ever after with my cheese and pasta and other assorted chemical ingredients to keep my cheese and pasta edible.

They sucked. Sucked badly. They sucked so hard that we no longer have a 24 hour day – the sucking put Earth off its axis.

You’re welcome world, you now have more summer and less winter due to Costco and their nasty mac & cheese balls!

Before I go rinse my mouth out with cake, I would like to describe to you how they tasted in my mouth-

Imagine a dead cow’s intestines were making the cheese and milk that went into this product. Then add in some regular pasta, which wasn’t disgusting as much as it was so soggy you couldn’t chew it without thinking of an old lady’s arm jiggle. Now roll that into some freak of nature bread crumb that came from a camel’s ass – part sand, part you-don’t-want-to-know. Coat this product in pure grease and stick it in a package. Then tell people to cook it and enjoy.

The fact that none of the Littles or the Giant (both of which are HUGE cheese and pasta fans) ate it, says it all.

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