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So as you all know, yesterday was the day of the big elections. I was reelected as The President and the Daddybeast has been ordered to remain in his post, apparently he wasn’t up for reelection and there is no stepping down.

Well, after a rough night and early morning Lola is demanding a recount of the votes.


I tried to make her aware that there was ONLY ONE VOTE and it was hers. She said she demands the improperly collected ballots be thrown out and the campaigning start again tonight with a vote tomorrow morning.

So I bet you’re wondering what happened….

Where to begin.

Lola is very “top-heavy”, shall we say? Well, this idiot jumps onto the wooden baby gate, but manages to get her ribcage stuck on it and ends up crashing into the ground on the other side, FACE FIRST. And The President is freaking out!

She limps away with a sore leg, some bruised ribs and a hurting mouth.

And then The President has to scream like a maniac at her and throw a few spanks around for good measure. Then once she is good and scared, we cuddle.

Needless to say, our morning today started off in similar fashion. The President yelling and spanking while trying to get the dog to learn how to STAY ALIVE.

So now we have to have another vote.

And in the running for The President is me…obviously, I’m going to win since I know how to schmooze. I’m offering bacon samples at tonight’s campaign fundraiser…

In the role of Daddybeast we have Jason running, who will definitely be reelected due to the fact that there is only one Daddybeast in the world. And the position is not a set term, nor is it voted in. You just ARE this position, kind of like you ARE the ball when bowling with Sheldon from Big Bang Theory. (She really loves Sheldon!)

And in the newest slot open, Auntie Jaye has been nominated to The Vice President position. Lola said this position entails stepping into The President role should the current one die, get electrocuted, overly stuff herself at a buffet or succumb to a bacon induced coma. It also means you must take the 17.6 hour CPR course she offers. (And let me tell you, I had to take it last night, in human time it feels even LONGER.)

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Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much