White sand, soft and warm. Beautiful blue water, clear as glass. Wind, gently blowing the salty fragrance. Sunshine, lightly bathing the skin in Vitamin D. These words bring up lovely images for people who are fond of the ocean. Being raised in Hawai’i, I’m sure you all naturally assume I must feel the same.

You would be wrong.

A meme showing a tranquil ocean with the phrase 'what normal people think of the beach...' and then a image of a shark jumping out of the water with the phrase 'what I think of the beach'

Beaches conjure up images from the most iconic movie of my youth. Watched well before my tiny brain was developmentally capable of distinguishing fact from fiction, Jaws marked the ocean as a deathtrap just waiting for me to jump in. I have a healthy respect for the dinosaurs that are still swimming in the ocean and refuse to barge into their home and make myself comfortable.

I swimmer in the water with a giant shark looming right behind her showing it's teeth like a smile. The shark says

Despite all of my friends and family attempting to convince me otherwise, my toes do not touch the ocean. I also shun the use of boats because Jaws managed to sink several of them throughout his movie career.

What proof do we really have that Titanic was sunk by an iceberg?!

No, thank you. I will happily sit on the sand, awaiting the screams of terror that will prompt me to call for emergency help. Should you make it back out alive, I’ll hand you a dry towel.

A cartoon shark who has his front half of the body out of the water and looking at you with his mouth open and the phrase 'cue my music' underneath him.

This is my newest Zazzle design. His name is Gustave and he hails from France – you may spot him wearing a beret when he is trying to blend in. Gustave is available in my store right now. Click right here to check him out!

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You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much

52 replies on “Cue my music…

    1. I did ask once, when I was in junior high school. They told me there were no sharks there. So I got on my boogie board and ended up having a mommy hammerhead shark circling underneath me… They were liars! That was the last time I ever went in the ocean, I was 13 years old.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I hear you. I too am wary of the beast that is the sea 🌊 You just don’t know who is hanging out there waiting…. I am a bit in love with Gustave btw especially as my kids always sing his tune despite never having even heard of ‘that’ movie

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh Heather I am right there with you about Jaws. My mom stupidly brought me to the movie theater to watch Jaws 2. IN 3D! I was 5 years old and had nightmares about sharks for years. While I still swam in lakes and pools, the beaches always scared me. Took me a long time to get over that damn shark! I remember when I was little, right after watching that movie I was afraid to take baths because I was convinced that Jaws was going to break through and eat me lol! #anythinggoes

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The movie may look cheesy as an adult, but it is terrifying to kids! Even Jurassic Park is less terrifying, because you can rationalize that dinosaurs are extinct. But sharks are real, and it’s hard to rationalize that as a child.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Never mind Jaws, what about those stinging jelly fish? I love the ocean, but you wouldn’t catch me swimming in it. I do think I’m more scared of tidal pulls than sharks though, I have experience of that which I never want to repeat. Lovely T design 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sand I can hack….but I will never ever ever swim in the sea! Only it’s not big scary sharks with sharp teeth I’m scared of …it’s fish!!Even the teeny tiny ones! #dreamteam

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I grew up in Hawai’i, and I had more scary encounters than I care to rethink on. I did go in the ocean for a few years after jaws, but each event made it harder and harder until eventually I couldn’t do it at all.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Isn’t it funny how things from early childhood shape our fears well into adulthood? On TV when I was small there was a British soap and a plane crashed onto the small village during the night. Now, if I hear a plane flying overhead at night I panic that the same will happen to us. Crazy

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The reality is that the great white sharks frequent our shorelines here in Cape Town so I don’t swim in the sea but there are those crazy people surf and swim and a few people were attacked already. So I prefer sun bathing on the shore, swim in a tidal pool or swim in the pool at home #dreamteam

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Just these images alone have traumatised me. Watched most of these aged 9 and have never taken to the sea since then. In fact I had issues with swimming pools, bath and the toilet for a few years after that 😱 I will not be letting my children see these films until there old enough to own their own home 😆. I was also born near the sea in Devon and learn’t to swim in it! I totally relate to this, as do most of my friends of the same age! #dreamteam

    Liked by 1 person

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