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Well this is a bit embarrassing. You’ve all showed up here because it’s Monday morning and you’re ready to read a fresh blog post. Well, I didn’t actually plan one out. I spent this weekend in utter glory and completely disengaged my brain.

I took a 4 hour nap on Sunday.

I’m not sure when the last time you’ve had a nap was, but I highly recommend it. Gather your fur babies, head to the bedroom, plop down on the bed, and just give in. For those of you with humans to take care of, I recommend you hop into a time machine and make a different decision on parenthood. Or better yet, buy a lottery ticket since you’ll know the winning number and then hire a nanny to care for your children while you nap for four hours every Sunday afternoon.

Your children will thank you.

Or maybe they won’t. Console yourself with the thought that if they don’t thank you, the world will still turn and you’ll still be a millionaire. You could buy a new family at that point, one that will be grateful for the stuff you give them even if you can’t be bothered to spend time with them.

Now that I’ve given you a goal to accomplish this week, how about we call this post a success? No? You still need more to be fulfilled? Okay, let me try one more thing that may make you feel better about your life decisions.

killer clown


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Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much or click to see a special collection below: