Sometimes I find myself watching an excessive amount of television. Instead of being productive during the day, I’ll binge watch Netflix until my legs practically atrophy from disuse. Sadly, I only really notice the problem when I look back on social media posts and realize they were all based on characters from the screen.

These are tales of those times.

I don't like the hexagon, I'm more of a herringbone kind of gal.

Yep, you only ever hear this on the Home and Garden channel. I walked into a home improvement store to look at a tile backsplash and actually tried this line out on the salesperson who was helping me. I’ve never been so satisfied in my life. Her mouth was flapping but no sound came out. She took a few deep breaths and I could almost see the wheels turning in her head to come up with a response. I think she wanted to laugh but couldn’t tell her brain to do it.

It was an impressive feat considering I wasn’t anywhere near herringbone or hexagonal tile displays!

I'm feeling very Christina Ricci from the Lizzie Borden series... I want to throw a neighborhood party. What did you think I meant?!

This is what happens when you binge watch a show about serial killers. Sometimes you end up wanting to be like them. Throwing parties I mean, not killing people.

Now, I’m going to go outside for a walk because there is a distinct ass print on my couch and I’m worried my knees will forget how to operate if I’m not careful about all this TV watching I’ve been doing.

I also ran out of episodes to watch.

Bonus points to anyone who knows why I titled my blog post this way. Hint, it has to do with Seinfeld, the best show that ever existed. Leave a comment!


Check out my Facebook page @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet

You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much

17 replies on “The Autumn of Heather…

  1. I’ve not seen Seinfeld. I know what you mean though. I did it with books at uni – read 10 of the Stephanie Plum books by Janet Evanovich within one weekend. I was pretty convinced all the characters were my friends and I’d see them in the hallway on the way to the kitchen! #BlogCrush

    Liked by 1 person

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