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I opened a drawer to get out a glass dish for a casserole and I found a nightmare staring up at me.

Somehow, two of my glass baking dishes has disintegrated into a million pieces while sitting in a kitchen drawer. I had to check the news to see if an earthquake had hit while I was sleeping – no earthquakes were reported. I then considered that a giant spider was walking across the counter, causing rumbling throughout the drawers underneath. I dismissed this as unlikely due to the lack of massive spider webs in my house this morning.

The only other plausible solution is that my house is haunted by ghosts who like to bake themselves brownies while I am sleeping.

Luckily my Spam cutting board was unhurt by the glass.

It took me two days to completely clean up the glass and I’m still extremely nervous to use the drawer. Six years from now I’m going to reach in and cut the crap out of my hand on a tiny little sliver of glass. I just know it.

Now would be the time for the Navy to move us again.


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