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The road trip is over. I’m posting the last of the terrifying road signs which inform you that death is imminent and you need to pay $15 to enter the National Park. They don’t say ‘may the odds be ever in your favor’ but it is heavily implied.

Today we are revisiting Mount St. Helens, since that is an epic volcano and had numerous signs to warn you that your death is looming. This tourist site has zero in the way of welcoming signs, they just plainly state the facts.

You Should Turn The Car Around.

A sign that says "Entering blast zone" at Mt St. Helens volcano

Welcome. You were alive the last time this volcano extinguished an entire town.

The scenery is breathtaking and you forget about this sign as you drive – but within a few short minutes you are reminded. There’s a huge hole in the side of the mountain top and you can see the carnage all around. Trees, trees, trees, and then…..BAM!! The trees abruptly end and all you see is barren rock with nothing on it.

This is very disorienting when you live in the PacNorWest.

If you make it to the top without turning around, you are unconsciously searching for the Run From the Volcano As Fast As You Can sign that was in the other parks with volcanoes. They had those handy arrows that told you where to flee in case of emergency. There are none of those signs in this area. That’s when reality hits you. There is no hope. If the mountain blows, you are simply dead. This volcano is a beast who wipes out everything for miles around.

We skipped the museum and hightailed it out of there with our pictures and our lives. I didn’t know what true relief felt like until we saw this final sign.

You Managed To Visit Without Dying.

A sign that says "Leaving blast zone" at Mt St. Helens volcano

Note that they don’t ask you to come again.

We didn’t die and we didn’t pee our pants – which was not a guarantee due to traveling with our 2-year-old nephew. If I’m being completely honest though, these signs made me not peeing my pants a very close call.


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