Lola was abandoned and suffered untold amounts of torture and emotional distress. No amount of money can compensate for it. However, to make the humans feel better she is requesting one case of Spam, low sodium, and two boxes of Twinkies.
Lola has decided to create a stockpile for future traumas.
Long story short, the Hubster and I decided to go shopping almost two hours from home and we left Lola at home. For 8 hours. Normally this doesn’t result in a puppy lawsuit, but we happened to leave while it was light out and it got dark without our return. We hadn’t left a light on – Lola isn’t fond of darkness. Lunchtime passed without a feeding – Lola isn’t fond of being hungry. We also hadn’t left her favorite TV show on – Lola is happiest when Seinfeld is playing on a loop.
The injustices were too numerous to recount!
By the time we returned home, Lola was in full-blown conspiracy theory mode. I knew I should have never let her watch the alien documentary on Netflix! Lola thought we had moved and left her behind. She was sure the government was conducting an experiment to see how easily humans would leave their fur children behind in the event they instituted a world apocalypse. Lola is shocked and horrified that we would so easily abandon her, and she’s pretty sad we made it an entire 8 hours before guilt drove us back to her.
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Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much or click to see a special collection below: