Last week I shared my road trip tips for safely arriving at your final destination. This week I’d like to talk about road trip fears that may lead to an altogether different final destination.

If that was too subtle, I’m talking about death.

Which is ironic considering the road trip tips post was titled Death in the Middle of Nowhere. I had to dig down deep into the scary middle of my brain, just to come up with a title for this post that conveyed all of the thoughts it incorporates. I hope I did it justice, but I was a little busy looking for dinosaurs lurking behind desert fauna.

A text box that says 'road trip fear: running out of snacks with no stores on the horizon.'

I packed 2 pounds of chocolate covered gummy bears to drive 35 miles down the road.

A text box that says 'road trip fear: visiting the desert and seeing a cactus bigger than a t-rex.'

If the cactus is that big, a T-Rex could be hiding behind it, waiting for dessert. I bet we taste like chocolate to dinosaurs.

A text box that says 'road trip fear: port potty. I would rather risk my bladder bursting.'

It is a glorified bucket. I’m horrified just thinking about it.

A text box that says 'road trip fear: spiders. big spiders. if you see one, there's actually a thousand.'

Spider football parties where screaming humans are the entertainment.

A text box that says 'road trip fear: you find the best cheeseburger of your life...and it's 1,000 miles from home.'

I found the perfect cheeseburger. It is 6,000 miles away and I have to cross the Pacific Ocean to get to it. My parents send photos when they eat it.
Now you all know why I am such an evil genius – it’s in the DNA.

Looking for more road trip fun? I did a series of ways to die while traveling in the state of WA. Read about it here.

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32 replies on “The cactus that could walk…”

  18. I hate porta potties too Heather. They’re disgusting! I don’t use them. But my favorite here are the spiders. The thought of spiders using us as entertainment like football lol! That cracked me up! #GlobalBlogging

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