Lola and the Littles typically get along together in daycare. Every so often Lola will need a nap without things being stuck up her nose or in her mouth so I’ll have to put her in the back. But for the most part, she tolerates the Littles and all their stickiness.
But not during bubbles.
During bubbles those Littles better back the hell up. The Lola is coming through and nothing, nothing, will stop her.
This picture was the start of the horror fest we call The Great Bubble Disaster of 2014.
That’s Lola in blurry, full-speed action with her tongue out and a bubble in her sights. What you can’t see is that there is a Little directly in front of Lola just outside the frame of the photograph.
And The Giant was so busy laughing, I failed to realize how badly this would all end.
The Big Little basically got punted by Lola and flew a good 18 inches. Feet were off the ground, arms were waving and nothing was going to stop his body from hitting the ground.
Luckily, the Big Little is resilient (and used to playing bubbles with Lola) so he got back up and only cried for about 2 minutes. But in the two minutes of crying it all continued to spiral out of control.
Bubbles were everywhere thanks to a machine that pumps them out even when you have a crisis to deal with. Lola was losing her crap completely and the Tiny Little was hysterical with happiness at all the commotion. Until a bubble landed on her face.
Now, I know where your brain just went, you think Lola attacked the Tiny Little’s face, don’t you? Well you’d be wrong. The The Great Bubble Disaster of 2014 was much, much worse than that.
The bubble popped right on the Tiny Little’s eyes.
And the screaming curses started. Be warned, this Little has a foul mouth.
“Motherf_ker, what the f_k just happened?!?!?! MY EYES ARE BURNING OUT OF MY SOCKETS!!!!! I am going to kick someone’s ass! What the f_k happened?!?!? It’s like acid! It burns so bad! Someone call an ambulance!!!!”
At this point I have the Tiny Little at the sink and I am rinsing her face. The cursing continued.
“Why the f_k is she drowning me?!?! I have goddamn acid in my face and she’s taking this moment to give me a bath?!?! F_k the Giant, I demand a new daycare! My mom is going to hear about this. Get your f_king lawyer on speed dial Giant, I am suing you for breach of trust. WHY ARE YOU BATHING ME, I NEED AN AMBULANCE?!?!?!?!“
I finally got the Tiny Little to allow me to dry her off and cuddle her. And as she hiccupped on my chest and desperately sought sleep to forget about The Great Bubble Disaster of 2014 she whispered “Giant, no more acid balls flying at my face please…”
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