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So today, in true fat kid fashion, a lady lit a car on fire in a McDonald’s parking lot. Why did she do that, you ask? Wait for it…..

Because the guy she was with wouldn’t buy her a McFlurry.

Apparently the gentleman in question was refusing to buy his love some ice cream with candy coated chocolate pieces inside and she borrowed his keys and torched his car.

And I thought I had Twinkie problems.

So there’s a few scenarios here that I imagine led to this car torching.

One) This poor lady had just fasted for three days a la Elaine in Seinfeld. She was so overcome by her boyfriend’s refusal of a dessert that she irrationally lashed out on the only thing he loved more than her.

Two) She had just found out she was pregnant and the craving was there but the dude was like “Hell no, we got a kid coming. We need to be frugal. Order off the $1 menu.” And of course there is no arguing with a pregnant person. So she decided to show him what the rest of the pregnancy would be like.

In which case he better run fast, run far and never look back. That’s usually when you trip and the person after you catches up.

Three) This guy was a big fat jerk. He got the cars, the video games, the clothes AND the tv remote. The McFlurry was the only thing she had until he refused it. She decided to burn it all down, starting with the nearest item. Dude better run home, bet she took a bat to your house. The video games are going to get it!!

All joking aside, the Hubster better not turn down my request for a snack because I took notes…

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