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Disclaimer: Offensive words coming up. Really offensive to some. Not offensive to others. Just note, I was given new words to use in this blog. The voices in my head are feeling some relief from all the pressure to create new ones.

So about a week ago a friend of mine who knows me just a little gifted me with a book that she thought I’d like. It’s called:

Creative Cursing: A Mix ‘n’ Match Profanity Generator

AND IT’S FUCKING AWESOME!!! It is basically a book cut in half and you flip each side randomly and it creates news ways to curse people out or call them really fucked up names.

Did it seem like I just used fuck too often??? No problemo. I’ll just replace fuck with twat clot.

It’s twat clotting awesome!!

See how great this book is?!?! Twat clot. Never would I have thought that up.

So in conclusion, Christina understands me all too well and the rest of you will get called really heinous names or read exceptionally unique cursing in the upcoming weeks.

You’re dildo diddling welcome you little wench hole!

And to anyone who finds this offensive maybe you need to perfect your fetus wrangling skills and have a little fun.

Check out my Facebook page @ShankYouHeather

I also tweet like a bird on Twitter @HeatherKeet

You can also find me on Instagram @ShankYouHeather and @ShankYouDesigns

Lola and I opened a store so we can sell our funniest blog sayings on cool stuff. Check it out at Shank You Very Much